Monday, March 20, 2006

The Crunchy Granola Song

I'm terribly flattered to have been asked to post on this blog. I would like to introduce my sophomore effort, which premiered in the comments below

my followup effort is
(sing to tune of Pina Colada song)

I was tired of the mainstream
We'd been together too long
Like a worn-out recording
Of a favorite song
so after drinking a six pack
I took my laptop to bed
And at the NRO website
There was this blog that I read

"If you like crunchy granola
making flour out of grain
have a house near the ghetto
ride a bike or the train
If you'd like reading Kirk at midnight
growing organic dates
I'm the guru that you've looked for
email me and escape."

I quickly hopped out of bed then
threw my TV away
-- hoped the crunchies would like that
I'm insecure that way.
Then I emailed Rod Dreher
hoping he would approve --
Since he posted my email
he must have been moved

"Yes I like Crunchy granola
dumped the car for the train
I am way into health food
and organic champagne.
oh yeah i really hate the mainstream
so cut through all this red-tape
sign me up as a crunchy
together we'll escape."

So I became a crunchy
and I felt so astute.
Threw out all my rock music
learned recorder and lute.
But then I read mainstream Jonah
And I said, "wait it's true."
sometimes mainstream IS crunchy
And I said, "I never knew...

that Jonah likes some granolas!
sometimes he takes the train!
doesn't only eat junk food!
tried organic champagne!
He thinks children are important!
and community too!
So what's a crunchy con then?
Now I don't have a clue.

To think -- instead of composing this ditty I could have been doing something "sacramental" like spinning my own wool. -- Kathleen


Blogger Lady Jane said...

Absolutely fabulous!!! Hilarious!

11:42 PM  
Blogger Susan B. said...

That was hilarious! It gave me a much needed laugh since I've recently had my own run-in with irate crunchy-con cheerleaders.

12:19 PM  

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